i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize