I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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