and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Randomize
