Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
