he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
