You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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