You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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