i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
