U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize