my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
