I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
