Me too!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize