guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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