Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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