my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
