I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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