Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
