is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
