We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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