I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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