Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
