it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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