just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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