I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize