What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I came so hard my ears popped.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
