Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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