He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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