Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
