We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
