these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize