dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Btw I puked in your glovebox
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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