Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Walk of Shame today included voting.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
