Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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