Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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