Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
