all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
