HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
