I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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