Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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