Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
