i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
