just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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