Umm I'm too high to move.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm just crazy horny about you
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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