apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
