chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
