Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
