just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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