ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
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