I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
