I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
