For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
