At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
